Scott Walker can't comment on Syria crisis because "he isn't president yet"


I am thinking of adding a feature to my website where I will have a "joke of the day" and all I will do is post a quote from Scott Walker. It's just too easy.

On several issues, he has attempted to not take a side — including when asked this week what he would do to directly address the crisis facing Europe as hundreds of thousands of refugees from Syria and other war-torn countries search for a safe place to live. Walker said the United States must fight the Islamic State, which he says is at the root of the crisis, but he wouldn’t take a stance beyond that.

“I’m not president today, and I can’t be president today,” Walker said in Rochester on Monday. “Everybody wants to talk about hypotheticals; there is no such thing as a hypothetical.”

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Hypothetical? There is a real movement of hundreds of thousands of these refugees. There is nothing hypothetical about that. Is it really so difficult to talk about the dangers of Islamization of Europe due to the massive transfers of population? Do you have to be president to talk of the dangers of increased terrorism from some who come from an intolerant culture? Walker dodges even the easy questions.

However, he looked really good doing his Tom Cruise Top Gun impression riding around New Hampshire on a motorcycle. A pity Jodi Ernst was not there to play the Kelly McGillis part again!

So what is Scott Walker willing to talk about?

He talked about former front-runners who never became president. He compared competing in the presidential race to running a half-mile track event in high school, sticking with the pack until the finish line is close. He also likened his strategy to skeet shooting, aiming the gun at the spot in the sky where the clay pigeon is headed, not where it already is.

Scott Walker is too busy writing poetry describing metaphorical ways in which he's behind in the race to talk about the real issues. I'm surprised he didn't tell the one about the tortoise and the hare! Let me close with a little more Walker-ism:

“I think what’s hurting anybody in the polls is that the media wants to talk about issues that the public doesn’t care about — or, I shouldn’t say doesn’t care about. The media wants to talk about issues that aren’t at the top of the list of what people want to talk about,” Walker said. “At the last debate, nobody asked those sorts of questions. You guys don’t ask those sorts of questions. But those are the questions people ask us.”

"The media want to talk about the issues the public doesn't care about--or I shouldn't say doesn't care about". And this is the new Walker. Then he talks about the issues people do want to talk about.... without ever mentioning what those issues are!

With Rick Perry out of the top ten, I fully expect Scott Walker to take his place and perform a strong comedic role in the next debate.

(Abridged version originally published in AT)



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Could Hillary's personality be improved with Ben Carson's help?


Hillary's handlers have leaked to the press that Hillary is planning to be more spontaneous, more human than before. The contradiction in terms is laughable. Plainly enough, Hillary has a personality problem. But then I started wondering, could Ben Carson, a renown neurosurgeon, help her? What if Carson opened up Mrs. Clinton's skull during exploratory brain surgery and tried to stimulate different parts of her brain?
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Watch a top lawyer rewrite Hillary's loyalty pledge


Taking a cue from the good Chairman Mao, Hillary Clinton is asking voters to sign a "loyalty pledge" stating they will vote for her in the upcoming election. The whole thing reeks of desperation because of the lumbering hospice/zombie campaign of Bernie "Weekend at Bernie's" Sanders who is slowly overtaking her in the primaries. But when I read the pledge it struck me how woefully short and underwritten it was; after all, a pledge is a kind of contract, but this one was bereft of many important contractual details. As a Harvard Law School trained attorney, like Obama and Ted Cruz (hopefully, a little more like the latter than the former), I thought I might help and give some tips on what Hillary's pledge should look like.
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Star Wars adding gay characters but lagging on transgendered stormtroopers


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Is it police brutality to treat male transvestite prostitutes like men?


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Please help Rick Santorum figure out why, 99 Iowa counties later, he's still at 1%


Americans are a helpful people. We give money to help wounded veterans; we give money to help fight diseases; and we even given money to the homeless, to spend on food, alcohol, and narcotics (though usually not in that order). That's why we need to band together to help Rick Santorum. He looked very puzzled in a Times article which discussed how, even after visiting all 99 counties in Iowa, he's only 1% in the polls, and about the same nationally.
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Bush may have zero percent support in Iowa


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"Muslims Lives Matter" comedy sensation sweeping Great Britain


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