The funniest things about the Mark Levin show



If you're a frequent listener to the Mark Levin show, as I am, you may notice some odd words, phrases, and sounds that repeat over and over. I have decided to make a list of the oddest:

1) "LevinTV is on many platforms--fire tablets, ipad, google play, apple TV, and Roku." I think I've heard Mark say the word Roku like 500 times. I am confident Mark has no idea what Roku is, but he is just reading the script a marketing person wrote for him. If Mark did know what he was saying he would realize he could simply say, "You can get LevinTV on any device that gets internet access." Instead, he calls each kind of internet device a "platform" and feels he has to list all kinds of internet connected devices. It's clunky... and funny!

2) Mark often refers to the "Circle Nerds at the Wall Street Journal!" Mark is making a very crude reference to masturbation here. He wants to say that the editorial writers at the Wall Street Journal are circle jerks; that is, they masturbate with each other. But he can't say that on radio so he calls them "circle nerds". This is funny because he is trying to be crude, but has to disguise the term so much so in the end almost no one knows what he's talking about.

3) Mark screams, "I'm not going to put on tights and wave pom poms!" Several times during each show Mark will scream that he will not put on tights and wear pom poms. He repeats this over and over. He is trying to say that he is not an unthinking supporter of a candidate. But Mark will not talk about all the times he put on tights and waved pom poms, when he gave hours of uncritical airtime to Donald Trump, or his quick endorsements of Orrin Hatch or Marco Rubio or Joni Ernst.

4) "This show is not about...". Mark talks at length about what his show is not about. He spends so much time talking about what his show is not about that at times his show becomes what it is not about. That is funny.

5) Mark screams, "I'm not going to talk about Fiji and meatballs!". This is a jab at talkshow host Michael Savage. I have listened to Savage only a few times but never heard him talk about Fiji or meatballs. But I have heard Mark talk frequently at length about restaurants and food; he often reminisces with callers about restaurants in their area. So Mark doesn't talk about meatballs, but he does talk about pizza and hot dogs and doughnuts.

6) Show turns into readings of audio books. When Mark's tone of voice suddenly becomes monotone, that's a cue that he's reading a chapter from Liberty and Tyranny or one of his other books to fill time. He often gives a lecture on capitalism and free markets and you know whenever the discussion becomes very abstract, he is simply reading from one of his books. He sounds like he is falling asleep, which is kind of funny.

7) Mark runs the show from a golf course. Mark broadcasts the show from "The bunker", meaning a room in his home address. His home on a golf course. Mark lives in a house on a golf course.

http://virtualglobetrotting.com/map/mark-levins-house/view/bing/

If a golf ball hits a window on Mark's home, millions of listeners will hear it.

8) The silent conversations with Mr. Producer. Mark calls his producer Mr. Producer. That is funny in and of itself. However, Mark also has one-sided conversations with Mr. Producer on the air. We never hear Mr. Producer's answers. Mark always asks him reaffirming questions such as "I was a perfect gentleman with that caller I hung up on, wasn't I?" It is funny that Mark broadcasts conversations where we hear the questions, but not the answers. During these silent responses I speak up to the radio, pretending to be Mr. Producer, and I always say, "Yes, yes, Mark, you're so right, you're so right!"

9) Mark can't get a call screen up. Mark always complains that his call screen, showing information about callers, does not work. He has a multimillion dollar show and can't shell out the money to get a computer that works properly.

10) Lack of barriers between important discussions and advertisements. Mark not only has ads between segments of his show but within segments as well. So he can be talking about how Hillary Clinton should be in jail, or how we should be alarmed about the Iran nuclear deal, and then in the very next breath be talking about how comfortable Casper mattresses are or how one of his books is on sale for only $7.33 on amazon.com but the price won't last long! It deflates from the seriousness of his subject when he can make a verbal u-turn within 5 seconds of talking about an important topic to talk about why you need to buy a LevinTV subscription RIGHT NOW.

11) "Do you have Levin TV? Do you want LevinTV?" When Mark feels that a caller has satisfied him, reinforcing one of his talking points (sometimes word for word), Mark will offer him a free subscription to Levin TV. It's funny because it's always an awkward conversation--the caller invariably claims to be a great supporter of Mark, and then has to admit that he does not have a Levin TV subscription, which shows that maybe he's not such a big supporter of Mark after all.

12) Weird grunge music. Each time a new segment starts, we hear intro rock music. Sometime it is regular rock music, but sometime it is really, really heavy metal grundge music, the kind you would associate with 1980 pothead kids banging their heads against the walls as they cheer the music in their drugged out state. The music is a total clash with the high-minded, intellectual conservatism Mark peddles. One minute you can be listening to some Kurt Cobain death music blasting at twice the normal volume, and a few seconds later you can hear Mark talking about the virtues of free market democracy.

13) Mark whistling along with the music. Many times you can hear Mark whistling along with the music. Off key. Is he unaware? That is funny too.

14) Each segment ends with someone yelling "MARK!" "LEVIN!" at the top of their voice, with the tap-tap-tap of drums between "MARK!" and "LEVIN!" Mark, who despises cults of personality, doesn't realize how over-the-top that is. That's funny!

15) Mark says that the purpose of LevinTV is to reach more people. But the fact that he charges for it makes it effectively unavailable to 99% of his free radio audience, making it clear that the purpose is not to reach more people, but to make more money. But it is funny hearing Mark declare that he doesn't do it for the money.

I listen to Mark because he is a solid conservative and has political insights that other talkshow hosts don't. He has a high IQ but not the highest emotional IQ, so he doesn't always realize how self-serving and transparent some of his statements are... which makes the show even more amusing.



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