The funniest guide to Politically Correct behavior ever!



The University of California published a guide to microaggressions. If you don't know what that is, microaggressions are ordinary, unoffensive comments and actions that offend feminists and minority "activists" with chips on their shoulders. Because this is such a big problem in the minds of liberals, UC has published an unintentionally hysterical guide to microaggressive behavior. What follows is a list of microagggresive behaviors, exactly as written, and then my own interpretation of what would not be microaggressive alternatives:

Microaggressive: Saying you're not a racist because you have Black friends.

Not Microaggressive: Saying you're a not a racist because you have Black friends who are also racist.

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Microaggressive: To compliment an Asian person on his math abilities.

Not Microaggressive: To compliment an Asian person on his reading abilities.

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Microaggressive: "America is a melting pot" or "There is only one race, the human race"

Not Microaggressive: "You are as different from me as I am from an amoeba."

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Microaggressive: "As a woman, I know what you're going through being a minority."

Not Microaggressive: "As a minority, I know what you're going through being a woman."

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Microaggressive: "I believe the most qualified person should get the job" (Really--this is actually listed as a "microaggression"!)

Not Microaggressive: "I believe the least white person should get the job."

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Microaggressive: "America is the land of opportunity, you can get ahead if you work hard."

Not Microaggressive: "America is the land of opportunity, you can get ahead even if you work hard or, if you're not into that, go on welfare."

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Microaggressive: Asking an Asian "Why are you so quiet? Speak up more!"

Not Microaggressive: Telling an Asian: "Shut up! Keep your big mouth closed!"

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Microaggressive: Faculty of color mistaken for service worker.

Not Microaggressive: White faculty member mistaken for professor.

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Microaggressive: Female doctor mistaken for nurse.

Not Microaggressive: Male nurse mistaken for heterosexual.

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Microaggressive: Raising your voice when speaking to a blind student

Not Microaggressive: Gesturing with your hands when speaking to a deaf student.

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Microaggressive: Being forced to choose between male and female on a form (this was really on the UC guidelines!)

Not Microaggressive: Asking applicants if they could go to the bathroom two feet away from a urinal.

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Microaggressive: Asking if a student is married or single

Not Microaggressive: Giving an option for "all of the above".

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Microaggressive: Labeling a heterosexual man who hangs out with women as gay.

Not Microaggre

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It' s time to ban a certain hate-filled flag


I'm a big fan of the first amendment. I don't like the idea of outlawing speech. But if the media says that some form of speech is a problem, then I think we should immediately ban it. I'm thinking in particular of one hate-filled flag that incites violence among many people, especially in the south. If a flag is a cause of such violence, shouldn't we ban it?
CONTINUE READING

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Do minorities disproportionately fail the death penalty IQ test because of racist tests?


There are a lot of claims about how supposedly objective tests discriminate against minorities. Most recently there are claims that tests for teachers have too many "white questions". Now the Supreme Court has ruled that killers must have a certain minimum IQ to be executed.
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A question for Nancy Pelosi: who is a better kisser, Obama or Boehner?


Nancy Pelosi is a real kissing bug. She's been seen kissing both Obama
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Court: doctors can give abortions via skype


There's a lot of limitations on what we can do, like eating food with transfat, or drinking soda in large cups, but the government places these limitations benevolently because its concerned for our health. That's why we can't pick insurance plans with only the health coverage we want any more. But when it comes to abortions, however, anything goes. If you want your babies brain suctioned, drilled, fried, or scrambled, there's a veritable IHOP menus of ways to end your pregnancy. In light of this an Iowa court has decided that doctors can administer some abortions via video conferencing.
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Charleston shootings spark alarming surge of Whiteophobia


In the wake of the white gunman who shot black church goers in Charleston, South Carolina, there has been a surge of Whiteophobia. Media outlets are making much of the fact that the gunman is white while the victims were Black, as is almost always the case in nearly 7% of all murders of black people.
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It's time to put a woman (Mrs. Obama) on food stamps


I was delighted to hear that we are getting that very dead white man, Alexander Hamilton, off the ten dollar bill. What did he ever do to deserve being there anyway? (Aside from being the first Treasury Secretary and setting up our financial system. But really, what has he done for us lately?)
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We need to work harder to keep state & national parks closed


Every time someone visits a state or national park chances are they disturbing precious wildlife. Birds that were singing mating calls will forget the words. Male deer who were battling with each other for the right to mate with the females will suddenly get shy, creating an opening for the maimed, blind deer to mate with the herd. Fish swimming upstream to spawn will get disoriented, and swim instead into lower income downstream tributaries filled with dangerous "gansta" fish.
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Woman refuses to have children for fear they will be white


The HuffPo has the touching story about a woman named Ali Michael, burdened with being White, who refuses to have children out of fear that they too will be white.
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Tests for teachers found to have too many white questions


When I was in school, I was always frustrated by tests where the questions were geared to Asians or Blacks or Eskimos; not being in any of these groups, I simply couldn't answer such questions! For example, while I could easily answer questions about adding or subtracting apples, or pears, whenever a question asked about adding or subtracting igloos, the question would be so alien to me that my mind would draw a blank!
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Has Michelle Obama been subject to Islamic genital mutilation?


Michelle Obama, in England in a school dominated by hijab wearing girls (which is a sad commentary on the United Kingdom), told the girls that
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